Thursday, September 2, 2010

DragonCon 2010: Official Troublemaker Preview

So they finally uploaded the pocket guide PDF last night and I’m getting my first look at it a mere five days in advance. According to Dragon*Con’s Facebook representative that is in no way unusual. As a matter of fact, I had a conversation with them about it:

ME: Things change and we adjust, but the pocket programs were available 55 days out last year.August 24 at 2:28pm via Facebook Mobile 

 Dragon*Con Phantom, simply not true. I think I would remember, being that I posted them and had to field the complaints from not having them sooner. :)August 24 at 2:35pm 

ME: Maybe we're talking about different things, but something informational that I received allowed me to write my preview 54 days out.August 24 at 2:39pm via Facebook Mobile

Dragon*Con All, I assure you, as soon as info is available, I will post. I am posting any and all information that is sent to me by track directors as it's solidified. August 24 at 2:46pm

Some douche that had nothing to do with the conversation: Kaung Set ‎@Phantom you probably meant the Progress Report (I did not). Even fan tracks haven't started posting schedules till the past month (simply not true - some were posted in early July). I know the actual Pocket Program was posted right around this time last year, Tues/Weds around 9 days out (also not true, Dragon nut licker). August 24 at 2:56pm

ME: Entirely possible. I refer to a "pocket guide" arriving, but that may be my term, not yours. Either way the Con is still going to be awesome.August 24 at 3:25pm via Facebook Mobile



Yeah, I pussed out.


I stopped before things got ugly and because I was at work and couldn’t get my MySpace blog to load so I could post a link to last year’s preview; which showed that I had all of this information long before they were claiming. Also, I opened the article by saying some slightly unflattering things about the buffoons that run the show. Kind of like I’m doing now. I sure hope I can link to this next year when they insist it’s perfectly normal to publish the pocket guides four days after the convention is over.
I kid! I love Dragon*Con and everybody that helps make it happen! Otherwise, why would I spend my valuable time writing about how awesome it is going to be and giving you guys a look at what I’ll be doing during the four entire days of my life I’ll be devoting to it?
Before I get to the schedule, there are some things that will be going on all weekend. I’ll be hunting down autographs, toys and comics in between drinking and sitting in panels. Here’s a look at some of the stuff I’ll be pursuing:

-More sketches than I can likely afford (I covered this the other day)
-Hard-to-find Doctor Who toys (The new Master, Amy Pond, new Daleks)
-Hot Toys’ first Iron Man figure
-Sideshow’s Gill Man
-That fucking exclusive Sgt. Slaughter
-The Doctor Who equivalent of Super Hero Squad (yes, this is a real thing)
-Shitty movies for future movie nights (THINGS is next. It needs wretched accompaniment)
-Numerous trade paperbacks

So if you guys come across any of that, do me a solid and send a message via Facebook and let me know!
Now on to the actual schedule. Obviously, everything here is extremely subject to change depending upon my mood, what I am involved in at the time and the amount of alcohol in my bloodstream.
Friday
I was totally expecting there to be some awesome, life-changing panel at 10:00 sharp Friday morning like there was last year (Shatner & Nimoy). I figured the big open for the con would be Stan Lee. Not so. While I personally am not super-stoked about Stan the Man, I know most people are. Much to my surprise, it looks like the first event of any consequence on Friday is the [adult swim] panel at 11:30. I’m planning on attending that one because it was funny the last time I saw it and also because if I plan on arriving in time to see it, that will ensure I’m there when the artist room opens at 1:00 so I can accost J. Scott Campbell, Kelley Jones and Tim Sale immediately. Hopefully I’ll be able to check in to the hotel as soon as I get down there.
11:30 – [adult swim] panel – This is mainly ATHF and Squidbillies, but it is a fun panel. I may or may not actually sit in on it; like I said, I’m mainly using it as a starting point. It’s more likely I’ll be wandering around checking out the other dorks with Jeffistopheles and Friend Steve.
1:00 – CONFLICT! – Buffy & Angel Guest Extravaganza/Artists’ Alley Opens – While I would love to see James Marsters do another panel, my absolute main primary #1 priority of the whole weekend is getting to Campbell, Jones and Sale for some sketches. Spike is just going to have to wait.
2:30 – Drawing On Terror – This is a panel on horror comics with Mignola, Jones and others. It should be pretty cool, but it makes me wonder if Jones will put in his first appearance in Artists’ Alley after this concludes.
4:00 – Quantum Leap – A panel with Scott Bakula and Dean Stockwell. I would really like to see this one, but it’s going to depend on what else I get caught up in. I’m pretty sure these guys will be entertaining and I loved this show when I was a kid.
6:00 – Dragon*Con Opening Ceremonies – I have never actually attended the official opening of Dragon*Con. And I honestly kind of doubt that’s going to change this year. Chances are I’ll be in my room getting ready for…
7:00 – DCMotherfuckingW Motherfuckers! – This might have been the most fun I had last year. Darth Pete, Evil, Gnoll, Monkey, Crazy Girl, your ol’ pal Phantom and more will be there to watch whoever the fuck shows up to compete in the squared circle. We’ll be drinking, yelling, cussing and possibly getting thrown out.
10:00 – CONFLICT! – The Lovely Ladies of J. Scott Campbell Costume Contest – As much as I would like to check this out, DCW lasts until 11:00 and unless they roll out some real suckasses like Lonesome Chicky Starr or Velvet Curtainlength I just can’t see leaving. Sorry, ladies. I’m married anyway.
12:00 – Super 8-Bit Brothers – I have a feeling this is going to be entertaining for about five minutes, but I want to check it out. They are followed by Weep, so if the Super 8-Bit Brothers are worth watching, I’ll be sure to leave when they’re done.
Post-12:00 – Heavy Metal Party/Wandering – Last year this was the point where I found out who could really hang. Me and Evil were the last men standing, and I lost track of him around 1:30. This year there is a heavy metal party being hosted by somebody. If me and Evil can get tickets for everybody Thursday night I’ll be there as Scott Ian. In a mask. (I just checked and there is a strict 1 per person policy on the party passes Thursday night – looks like we might be skipping these)
Saturday
Here’s hoping my constitution is stronger than it was last year. While I did manage to wake up in time to see the parade, I did not possess the willpower to make my way to a viewing point after getting my breakfast. I’m gonna see that damned thing this year.
Also, I wasted a good hour or more putting on my stupid costume on Saturday morning last year. This year I’m putting on the mask and that’s it.
10:00 – Dragon*Con Parade – I’ve never seen it. I intend on changing that this year. I hope it’s worth it.
11:30 – Timothy Zahn Autograph Session – I’ve skipped this two years in a row now. Last year, though, I lost my first edition prints of the Heir to the Empire trilogy in the post-Dragon*Con flood. If I had gotten them signed, they would have been in a different place in the house and I’d still have them. Luckily Mrs. Troublemaker found copies at a garage sale (though not in nearly the condition I had kept mine in), so I’m getting it done this year. No more missed opportunities for me.
1:00 – CONFLICT! – Venture Bros. Panel/Jim Butcher Autograph Session – Shit. Out of the hundreds of different things going on, the only time Jim Butcher will be signing all weekend is scheduled at the same time as the one panel that I refuse to miss.
2:30 – CONFLICT! – Venture Bros. Signing/Star Trek: TNG Panel – Double shit! I really want to get my Henchman 21 figure signed, but I also really want to see this loaded panel. Maybe I can get through the Venture line fast enough to catch some of the Star Trek panel that surely won’t hit capacity (yeah, right).
4:00 – CONFLICT! – Stan Lee Panel/Firefly Panel – DAMN YOU SATURDAY! DAMN YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL! I’m probably going to have to go with Firefly since there isn’t another one this loaded. Lee has a Sunday panel.
5:30 – Adam Savage Panel – While I think this will probably be entertaining, I’m only going to sit in if I have nothing better to do.
Post-5:30 – Nap? Dinner? – Unless something phenomenal comes up I’ll be in my room for a while, dozing in front of Dragon*Con TV; emerging around 8 or 9 to fuck shit up.
10:00 – Nuts on the Road/Heroes Versus Villains Party/Getting Super Drunk – Naturally getting super drunk is the main part of Saturday’s plan, but I’m curious about this Nuts on the Road. It’s some kind of quiz show thing featuring a ton of famous dorks – Ken Plume, Dana Snyder, the Venture guys, the MST3K folks and Adam Savage. I think it sounds pretty awesome. Also, the people who did the Friday night Metal party are doing a Heroes Versus Villains party – whatever that means. It just occurred to me that there’s no way we’re getting passes to these. Thursday registration starts at 10 AM this year, so they’ll be long gone by the time I get there around 6:30.
Sunday
Not only did I not have a room for Sunday night last year, I also didn’t plan anything for Sunday. It ended up feeling like the last day and that shit isn’t cool. I also stood Gnoll up for mc chris, so I owe him a Sunday night adult beverage this year (call me on that, LEGO man).
10:00 – Jim Butcher Panel – While I would love to see this – Butcher is my current favorite author – I probably won’t. Ten AM on Sunday is likely to be a sensitive time for me.
2:30 – CONFLICT! Stan Lee Panel/Batman Panel/Star Wars Authors Panel – FUCK YOU, SUNDAY! You’re almost as bad as Saturday. The Man is once again coming into conflict with my other nerd interests, and these two are near the top of my list of awesomeness. Lee pretty much gets knocked out of contention when put up against Kevin Anderson, Timothy Zahn and Michael Stackpole talking about the Expanded Universe or Paul Dini, Neal Adams, Tim Sale and Brian Stelfreeze discussing Batman. I’m really not sure which one of those is going to win.
4:00 – Futurama Panel – This should be fun. Maybe at some point I’ll get John DiMaggio to sign this new Bender figure I got.
Post-Futurama Panel – A trip home – Despite all the fun I’ll be having this weekend, I’m going to be missing the rest of the Troublemakers something fierce. Mrs. Troublemaker will be around Friday and Saturday since she’s working the Odin’s booth (stop by and say “hi”), but I’m going to have to go back home to see Lil’ Troublemaker at some point. We’ll definitely be taking him down on Monday, but that probably isn’t going to be soon enough. I’m just not at the point where I can go more than a day without hanging out with my son.
10:00 –Back to party – Time to start drinking again. There are a couple of options for Sunday night. G4’s very own Chris Gore is hosting a party with a cash bar and later on…
12:00 – URIZEN – This is the only music act I’m going to go out of my way to see. They might suck. I’ll be sure and let you know.
1:30 – Cruxshadows – I’m probably not going to have a whole lot to do by 1:30 in the morning. Chances are it’s either this or sleep, and sleep is for the weak.
Monday
This is Lil’ Troublemaker’s day. I’ll be getting up as early as I can to check out, run to the house and pick up the family. After that, it’s up to him what we do.
Man, I got a little bummed out just thinking about the last day. I’m going to have to go back and re-read Friday and Saturday just to get the taste of post-Con malaise out of my mouth.
I’ll be updating all weekend long whenever something awesome comes up or I think about it. Remember, you can follow my stupid antics on Facebook and Twitter. If you see me, be sure to say “Hi”. And buy me a drink.

Until next time, stay creepy
-Phantom

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